Wednesday, September 7

Oh, baby


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Last Tuesday, Shawn and I became aunt & uncle to our first ever nephew, Avery Vladimir Lau. (What a big name for such a small human!) Not only is it our first nephew, but it's his mom's first grandchild too... so I guess it's a pretty big deal! His brother lives a few hours away from us, so we probably won't meet the little dude until Thanksgiving, but to be perfectly frank, I am a-ok with that. Newborns are weird! They look like little aliens and, as my friend Amy so eloquently put it, "all they do is sleep, eat, piss, and poop". (To which I responded, "well, that's all we really do in essence too, we just added all the other stuff in for shits and giggles." I mean, really. Think about it.) I am not what you would call a baby person. Luckily for me, neither is Shawn!

I've probably alluded to it on the blog before, but I have never really had any desire to be a mother- there are no ticking clocks or maternal instincts in this body! In fact, the thought of carrying something inside me for nine months and then having to raise it for 18+ years is downright yucky gross repulsive uncomfortable scary << all of the above. I don't believe all that "Oh but having kids will change your life!" BS that new parents spout to make themselves feel better about the fact that kids have taken over their lives. (No disrespect to my parents, who raised three strong and amazing children!) But while I have no desire to nurse anything other than a hangover (and even that's iffy), I've always said that I look forward to being an aunt. And that day has finally come! I always thought it would be one of my siblings first, but that's because I never accounted for there being, well, other siblings in the picture. (You know, sibling-in-laws. Side note: who the heck ever thought the term in-laws was worth keeping around?!) Now that I have a nephew, I'm actually kind of excited! It's like holding someone else's ice cream cone for them while they tie their shoe, and you can steal a few licks but give it back once it starts to melt. (Did I really just compare having a nephew to holding someone's ice cream cone? I did.) I mean, I'm not saying I'll be volunteering to babysit or anything... but it's kinda cool imagining the type of aunt and uncle we'll be. (Probably the kind that say "don't tell your parents we let you do this!!!")

Anyways, all of that to say that I rounded up a few congratulatory little-human cards for you, in case you know anyone who is expecting. You can really go in all kinds of directions with baby cards, depending on what your stance is on kids. I bought this one in a pinch, but I'm kinda upset because there are so many other fun ones out there! Another one I contemplated just had text across the front that read "Congratulations on your little tax deduction." Yep. Tell them how you really feel!

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